FORGIVENESS - How TRUE Is The IMPLICATION??

Forgiveness.

I have never really understood the sense of the word in the way it is generally used, or what it implies to. I have read many quotes, been told numerous times that forgiving and forgetting are the two pillars that will make your life a peaceful journey, along something that implies rendering a wishful, sane life. Maybe that holds true, in connection with great people who have arrived on such equations. I do not challenge the theory behind these, however, neither do I hold them true.

Honestly, I don’t really think that I am a very forgiving person by nature, neither do I have the conception that someone else is. I have never really forgotten someone who has hurt me or the way I have hurt others (that is the thing – u always know when you are hurting someone, though you may never acknowledge it) , by words or by actions; yes, the memories have faded and there are layers of my own self covering them. Some scars, some tears, and some wounds simply remain unhealed, paining somewhere continuously, which one may realize only when one wishes to, but one also dives down to these unseen places if any situation/person presents a close replication of something that remains intact in your memory as a not so pleasant situation. There are people around me with whom I have had hurtful relationships, with me crying more than often and much more than required. I laugh, play, share, and love them dearly, for they have also been the ones to steer me in the roughest weathers of my life.. Yet, the fact remains, that I have never really forgiven any of them; there are some whom I snapped out with, while some drifted away themselves. And the few that are still there, the present connection presents a beautiful meaning only if the past is not mentioned. Maybe I belong to a lowly class of humans, yet I find it hard to trust again, to bind again, and if in the sense of the word I work up an association again, I am more likely to jump to the preceding hurtful incidents as and when I may feel I am being poked unruly again.

I don’t know how many of us really move on, forgiving people for making us cry, depressed and vulnerable. For messing around our lives, and for saying things that should never be said. For hurting us, yet making us the Bad Man in question. Personally, I don’t think I ever do that, or I have the courage to go past such people. I resent. And a handful of hurtful experiences make us more prone to resentment, always ready and at go at the strike of three with the best of the weapons we have collected. I simply belong to this class of people. Simply put.

I doubt if a wife cheated on by her husband really forgives him and stays back, and never does the thought of being cheated on again dawn on her again. Or a friend whom you hurt once does not take guard on him should a situation alike to the one that might have prompted you to say or do something hurtful? For, if I have truly understood, forgiveness implies that the minutest of the feeling of an hurtful incident of a person has been wiped off your heart clean, and the only image that remains has no shadows whatsoever. Does that really happen?

Just Friends - Ruining Friendships

Relationships are the truth of every individual, the basis of existence of human race. Relationships form us, shape us, and are in every way responsible of what and who we become, our behavioral aspects, psychological development and perhaps even our being. We have all had our fair share of heart breaks, heart boils, and even boundless joys. Personally, I am no exception; for I have been in and out of them, sometimes for my own release and at others because it just did not feel right. Every relationship has left an imprint of its own in my life, some are scars, yet others are ecstatic indentions. If we were to exclude the relationships that bind us by blood, I would say the most important outside relationship, and perhaps the first ones of our lives is friendship. Like in every other relationship, friendship too needs a connection to be built up, and the energies suggest you to trust, love and bind together.

Friendship is a beautiful feeling of togetherness, coupled with expectations and compounded interests. I have come to believe, that basically in life, we are lucky to have even 2 to 3 such people with whom we needn’t to pretend; for pretension is one of the deadliest threat to any relationship; the others probably being compromise, complaints, and perhaps possessiveness. Also, maybe its only our friends that we completely open to, acknowledging defeat and guilt, accept denial and wrong doings, admit of being the spoil sport in some one else’s life, share our deepest grief’s and sorrows,

Friendship is often a misguided and misused term that can be feigned to a lot of socially deniable, illegitimate and complex relationships. “Just Friends”; in my opinion is the most misused term when it comes to accept relationships. All of us, at varied points have time, have probably used or heard the “just friends” excuse, and we all know what it implies; real friends never use the just friends term. Off late, the proximity of physical closeness in the relationship men-women friendship has taken to new heights, however, questions are generally answered with a ‘just friends’ two word ending theory. Believe it or not, there are a lot of dirty tactics behind the veil of just friends.

Love, I believe seconds friendship, and there are boundaries in love. It is said that friendship lends the most solid foundation to any relation, though there are exceptions of the relations we have by birth. If I had to say, I wouldn’t even think twice before concluding that friendship is far above, far more than all other and any other relationship we do not bound into by birth.

So what defines friendship? Honesty, trust, love, care, respect, space – most of the pillars are prerequisites of all relationship. But what distinguishes friendship are the chords that are released when we do not pretend- we are free and we are we. The expectations levels are more or less meant, it can be put in the backseat as per priority, yet it remains the vital element of our existence.

Friends are generally the first people we turn to in times of despair. Perhaps, the rank isn’t so high when we are happy. This is indeed a strange relationship, by far the most important – yet misused terminally.